I can use some advice

So.... I have this friend that I was really close to since like kindergarten and we have had our differences over the years but she was s got engaged she assumed she was in the bridal party ( although never formally asked) I was fine with that at the time and let it go bc i was probably going to ask her any. BUT over the last year she got a boyfriend and different friends and kinda ditched me, doesn't call me anymore, and we haven't hung out in over 3 months, I told her i was upset about it but nothing ever changed. When we do talk she talks like she is in the bridal party. Honestly i don't wanna seem like a b*tch but if she is going to be such a bad friend I don't want her in my wedding party. I feel like we are growing apart and I am fine with that but i do not want her to be in my wedding if she is not going to be there for me. Am I wrong? What do you guys think? How do I approach this? I just need some help! Thanks!

Message edited 11/17/2009 7:43:40 PM.

Re: I can use some advice

thats a tough situation. I dont blame u for not wanting her in your wedding party I wouldnt want someone like that too. My sis went through the same thing she did tell her that she didnt want her in the wedding party I dont remember how she brought it up but i will ask her but after that they never talked again she never even came to the wedding. If u are serious about telling her shes not part of the bp you should be prepared for her to not even come to the wedding if thats how it turns out. Good luck and ill post again when I talk to my sis and ask her how she handled her situation.

Re: I can use some advice

I don't think you are wrong at all. I wouldn't want her in my BP either if I were you. Especially since you already addressed how you felt with her and nothing changed. I'm not sure exactly how you should approach this because I was never in this type of situation before but hopefully other brides will be able to give you advice in that area.

Re: I can use some advice

yea i have a few freinds that we discussed bein in the bp and now they are being ****** so....honestly i dont want people ruining my day as well as people that im not going to be freinds with down the line, maybe theyll be pissed but in the end...being in the bridal party is not their birth right its something that happens as a result of being a good freind and if thats not the case i say X em!

Re: I can use some advice

I was in someones bridal party a few years ago. I am not as close with them anymore and frankly we've been butting heads a lot.

I feel obligated to have them in my bridal party.

Frankly, for me - it's the right thing to do. So she will be in my party but everyone's different. I may be obnoxious when it comes to a lot of things but frankly I just don't have the heart to tell anyone in the party that I don't want them in it.

Re: I can use some advice

Thanks for the advice... the thing is i dont have the heart to tell her she is not in the party, but the thing that bothers me the most is that the only reason she calls me now is bc she is starting her business as a financial planner and she wants to talk business, and now she is constantly calling and nagging my family, me and FH's family and that annoys the hell out of me. Its like she cant call and say hello or ask me how im doing.... when my uncle passed away over the summer i texted her and she never called to see how i was.... I just dont feel that she is not being a a good freind and i feel us drifting apart, and i dont want to end up regreting it if i have her in my party..... I just don't know how to approach the subject....

Message edited 11/20/2009 10:18:44 PM.

Re: I can use some advice

well if you figure out a nice way to broach the subject without this person hating you and still being part of your life without them cutting you out than let me know! lol because I could use the advice as well!